The Heist

Once upon a time, in a bustling village eMatopos, where WiFi was scarce but gossip spread faster than a WhatsApp voice note, lived two unlikely friends, Mvundla (the hare) and Qhude (the rooster).

Now, Mvundla was a smooth talker, the type to convince you that buying his “unlimited” mobile data would somehow work in an area with zero signal. Meanwhile, Qhude was a little slow—like that one uncle who still asks, “How do I reply to a text on this touch-screen phone?” In those days, Qhude and all his relatives could fly.

One day, as hunger hit harder than load shedding at dinner time, the two friends came across a massive field of fresh millet, belonging to the village’s most feared farmer, Malume Mthunzi. His motto? “Steal from me, and you’ll regret it.” (And trust me, he meant it.)

Being the mastermind he was, Mvundla turned to Qhude and whispered, “Mf’ethu, let’s eat to our hearts’ content. But if we get caught, just remember… I run. You fly. Simple strategy to confuse the enemy, right?”

Step One: The Heist Begins

The two sneaked into the field and feasted like they were at a buffet after fasting for three days. Qhude, enjoying himself a bit too much, even started singing, “Haa! This millet is hitting different!”

Mvundla, stuffing his cheeks, warned him, “Shhh, uyabhayiza! You want us to get caught?”

But alas, old Malume Mthunzi had state-of-the-art security, his trigger-happy son visiting from Israel with a sling shot and an anger level set to “Maximum Vawolens.”

Step Two: The Great Escape

The boy spotted them, grabbed his weapon, and yelled, “I see you! Awu, today you’re finished!”

Mvundla, faster than a network switch from 5G to Edge, took off at lightning speed. But Qhude? Instead of flying away as agreed, he started panicking and running on foot.

Mvundla, already halfway to safety, turned back in shock: “Kodwa lawe Qhude mf’ethu! Why are you running? YOU HAVE WINGS!”

Qhude, now huffing and puffing, screamed back, “I FORGOT!”

Step Three: Consequences & Regret

The boy’s stone flew like a professionally kicked penalty and boom! Hit Qhude right on the head. Feathers went flying like a bad wig in strong wind. (The doctors suspect brain damage by the way, they are only whispering because of doctor-patient confidentiality) 🤫. Qhude has not remembered how to fly ever since.

Meanwhile, Mvundla, chilling under a tree, shook his head and muttered, “I can’t believe I befriend people like this.”

Moral of the story?

Know your strengths and use them. If you have wings, don’t run like a headless chicken.
Never trust a hare in a heist. He always has an exit plan that doesn’t include you.
Don’t sing while stealing.